June 18, 2012

Physical Intimacy

Written by Boyd Bailey

Thoughts from daily Bible reading for today- June 18, 2012

“The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality—the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband. Marriage is not a place to “stand up for your rights.” Marriage is a decision to serve the other, whether in bed or out.” 1 Corinthians 7:3-4, The Message

Our marital duty is neither to demand sex nor to endure sex, but to see it as an expression of love and respect. We have the unique privilege to connect with our spouses at a spiritual, emotional and physical level in ways no one else can. Physical intimacy is a privilege reserved for marriage. Done well, it takes time and planning. Yes, there are those spontaneous intimate rendezvous’, but we all need to be intentional in learning to understand our spouse’s needs and desires. When we emotionally connect and communicate throughout the day it often leads to physical intimacy at night.

The richest and most fulfilling physical intimacy flows out of emotional intimacy. When a husband and wife connect emotionally with their feelings they are better primed to connect physically. Indeed, physical intimacy is more than a transaction; it is a relational process that often finds its highest expression in the event of two becoming one. Women who deny their husbands for an unreasonable time can unwittingly signal disinterest and disrespect. Men who rush past the emotional needs of their wives, miss engaging their need for security, attention and respect. See how Solomon expressed passion to his bride:

“How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful! Your eyes are doves. How handsome you are, my beloved! Oh, how charming! And our bed is verdant [lush].” Songs of Solomon 1:15-16

On a practical level reserve the marriage bed for both sleep and physical intimacy. It is a sanctuary for sleep and an enclave for physical intimacy. Avoid competing with children and activities in the bedroom: television, eating, computers, sleeping kids and dogs are for another time and place. Craft a haven for physical intimacy and you will experience physical intimacy. Throughout the day be intentional to create emotional chemistry with notes, phone calls, caring words, empathetic listening, gifts and kind acts of service.

As followers of Jesus—because of your spiritual synergy and emotional engagement—you and your spouse have the opportunity for the most fulfilling physical intimacy. Ask the Lord for creative ways to love your lover like they love to be loved. Your marriage relationship illustrates the relationship between Christ (the groom) and His church (the bride). Indeed, physical affection flows from spiritual and emotional intimacy. Thus, be prayerfully intentional and watch your relationship go from good to great for God’s glory.

“Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest is my beloved among the young men. I delight to sit in his shade, and his fruit is sweet to my taste. Let him lead me to the banquet hall, and let his banner over me be love.” Song of Songs 2:3-4

Prayer: Heavenly Father, give me the grace and wisdom to connect with my spouse spiritually, emotionally and physically.

Related Readings: Genesis 4:1; 25:21; Song of Songs 2:14; 4:16; 1 Peter 3:7

Post/Tweetthis today: Emotional investments invite intimacy. #emotions #intimacy

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Comments

  1. veronica says:

    what if the husband was abusive in diffrent ways and perverted to her and others during the marriage…. sexually perverted….. along with porn… then what… what if the wife has no money is too old to move on her own… and has no feeling… its even hard to be kind to the guy.
    Then what. please respond asap

  2. Wendy says:

    Boyd, I prayed that God will give my husband a sign and thank you for sending this devotion out today. Pray that God will open my husband’s eyes to truth of God’s Word. Keep sending these strong messages about marriages and what God’s word has to say about them.

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