December 1, 2009

Engaged To Marry

Written by Boyd Bailey

Engaged To Marry… “This is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about. His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together she was found to be with child though the Holy Spirit.” Matthew 1:18

Marriage engagement is an exciting and sobering time. It is exciting because of the anticipation of being together with the one you believe God has destined for you to live with for the rest of your life. It is sobering because of the responsibility to love and care for another person in an unselfish and giving way. Indeed, the engagement period is preparation for marriage. For example, use this window of time to pay off debt and heal any fractured relationships.

Wise young couples are not just infatuated with each other and the upcoming wedding, but they are also practical to prepare for marriage. They may enroll in classes on money management from a Biblical perspective, or invest time in completing and discussing a marriage assessment around everyday issues like parenting, spiritual leadership, finances, conflict resolution, decision-making, communication, and sex. Pre-marital instruction and application can save couples from unnecessary conflict down the marriage road.

Furthermore, wise couples pray for a mentor couple that can shepherd their relationship during this engagement time, meeting with them over dinner or coffee and listening to their lessons learned during their years of marriage and managing expectations. Be wise to spend much more time in marriage preparation than in wedding planning. One is an event that is over in a few hours, while the other is how you plan to spend the rest of your life together.

Lastly, Christ is the cornerstone of any engagement. Keep Him front and center in your conversations and decision-making. Ask Him for the grace to communicate with people who may have agendas different from your dream wedding. Make sure your wedding ceremony honors Jesus Christ by keeping the content grounded in Scripture, and that the look and the feel of the service honor the Lord. The marriage engagement time is God’s gift to prepare your heart, your mind, your soul, your relationships, your finances and your faith.

How can I best prepare my heart, mind and finances for marriage? Who is a mentor couple that can invest in us during our engagement and on into our marriage?

Related Readings: Genesis 19:14; Deuteronomy 20:7; 1 Corinthians 7:36; Hebrews 13:4

Transformational Living
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