Thoughts from daily Bible reading for today – November 20, 2018
Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7
Before I married, I traveled a lot. I enjoyed hopping on an airplane for a speaking event or to visit family.
But one day that all changed.
One afternoon as I entered a familiar airport, my chest tightened, my breathing became shallow, and I felt panic rise in me. This feeling stayed with me until I boarded my flight.
A few weeks later, the same thing occurred again. Nothing like this had ever happened to me before; I was perplexed. My “airport episodes” happened in my early forties right as deep grief of not marrying or having children was hitting me hard. I was painfully lonely, more than I had ever been in my adult life.
I sought the Lord, “Please show me why this is happening.” I decided I would review some of my old journal entries for the answer. Over and over—for months—I had been writing the lie, “I am an orphan.” My family lived many states away and I didn’t have a solid support system. My father had died, and my two best girlfriends had run off to heaven with Jesus. I felt extremely vulnerable. I wrote, “There is something wrong with a 40-something woman living alone, far away from her family with no one to love.”
So, there I had it. I had been telling myself I was an adult orphan and that I was all alone. And so, I figured that whenever I entered an airport, the sea of people and perhaps the “bigness” of it all exacerbated my emotional pain, causing me to panic.
I made a plan. The next time I entered an airport, I decided to tell myself the truth; that I am a beloved daughter of God and that I am not an orphan and never alone. I imagined Jesus beside me on the moving walkway. I talked with him and sang a song confirming my confidence in his presence. I practiced Christ being with me each time I traveled. My feelings of panic disappeared and never came back.
You may remember that in John 8:32, Jesus says, “. . . you will know the truth and the truth will set you free.” If the truth sets you free, then lies will keep you bound—and I was definitely emotionally bound up with the lie that I was all alone.
Are you wrestling with a particularly difficult emotion? Take your struggle to the Lord and let him speak his truth into it. Then, take him at his Word and believe what he says about who you are and who he is to you. His truth is liberating.
“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid” (John 14:27).
Lord, thank you for your truth that brings freedom. During those times when I am wrestling with emotions that are not of you, when I am afraid or anxious, help me to believe you and trust your truth. Amen.
If you are wrestling with a difficult emotion, perhaps anger, loneliness, fear, or frustration, speak with Him about what you are feeling. Ask Him what is behind your trouble. Is there are a lie you are believing that needs to change so you can be set free into greater emotional wholeness?
I am a beloved child of God, I am not an orphan and never alone. #WisdomHunters #PeaceinPanic
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