April 26, 2022

Let That Relationship Problem Make You Better, Not Bitter

Written by Shana Schutte

God is never unfaithful, even when man is.”

Thoughts from daily Bible reading for today – April 26, 2022

But I have trusted in Your lovingkindness; my heart shall rejoice in Your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because He has dealt bountifully with me. Psalm 135:6

Life is filled with blessings and difficulties, but regardless of what we experience in life, one of the keys to being an overcomer and living a victorious life isn’t so much about what happens to us as how we respond to what happens to us. 

One of the things everyone alive experiences is relational conflict and most of us have felt betrayed by someone, maybe because of what they did or didn’t do, how they hurt us on purpose, or how they hurt us through neglect. 

As it is with all things in life, we can choose how we handle the hurt and we can allow betrayal to make us better, not bitter. Therefore, we have two choices when betrayal comes knocking: we can become disillusioned and cynical, or we can become more realistic, wise, discerning, and loving. 

The disillusion cynic decides not to trust anyone. They determine to stop hoping for good relationships and they shut down their desire for loving interactions. 

On the contrary, the discerning and wise person knows this world is not their home (Ephesians 2:19).  They know perfect relationships await only on the other side of heaven, but until then, the wheat will grow up with the tares (Matthew 13:24-30) so people will sometimes hurt one another. They also know that the Adversary comes to steal, kill, and destroy, so life will be punctuated with relational pain (John 10:10). 

They know the rain falls on the just (Matthew 5:45). They are realistic about the condition of the human heart and the condition of our sinful planet, but they are not cynical. They know God is at work in even the most horrendous experiences, just like He was at work in the tragedy of the cross. They know His love is bigger than betrayal. So, they choose to press into the Faithful One they can fully trust and allow betrayal to make them better, not bitter. 

Every now and then we see pastors or Christian leaders fall into grievous sin. In the wake of their downfall, they have followers who abandon faith. This is tragic. We must always fully trust in God, not in man. God is never unfaithful, even when man is. Man may change; God does not. 

Betrayal is an opportunity to become wiser. It’s an opportunity for your heart to enlarge, to become more like Christ, and to trust Christ more fully. Don’t allow betrayals to shrink you. Allow them to enlarge you and make you a better, more loving, and forgiving person. 

The beloved author, Oswald Chambers wrote: 

“He [God] knows that every relationship not based on loyalty to Himself will end in disaster. Our Lord trusted no man, yet he was never suspicious, never bitter. Our Lord’s confidence in God and what His grace could do for any man was so perfect that He despaired of no one. If our trust is placed in human beings, we shall end up despairing of everyone.”

It’s best when our relationships are grounded in the truth that God alone is perfect. This truth can help us to forgive and remain tenderly loving toward humanity and those closest to us when they disappoint or hurt us. 

“It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man” (Psalm 118:8).


Lord, thank you that I do not have to try and protect myself from the disappointment of human betrayal by becoming cynical. Instead, I can remain open and loving because I know that you love me and are personally taking care of me. I fully trust you, Lord.


Is there someone who has hurt you who you need to forgive and give to God? When you forgive, it will open your heart so you can become better, not bitter.

Related Reading

Jeremiah 17:5-7; Psalm 40:4; Psalm 62:8-9

Worship Resource

Lauren Daigle: Trust in You


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