“We all need to be mothered by multiple people in our lives.”
Thoughts from daily Bible reading for today – May 11, 2021
Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing. 1 Thessalonians 5:11
I remember the exact moment when I realized I wasn’t going to have my own children.
It was just after my forty-first birthday and I had visited a church to listen to a guest pastor speak on emotional healing. I don’t remember exactly what he said, but something in his words resonated with the disappointment I felt about not becoming a mom. I was still single and the possibility of finding my Mister was nowhere in sight. I couldn’t help it. I cried—and sometimes sobbed—for over an hour.
I felt cheated.
Why was it that other women had been gifted with becoming mothers, and I hadn’t?
After my thirty-fifth birthday, I never really liked Mother’s Day much. It meant sitting in the back of a church while the pastor praised moms. And because I wasn’t one, I felt as if I had failed in giving something important to the world. I often felt left out, and sometimes felt insignificant.
What had I done to care for anyone in a lasting and meaningful way in the way mother’s care for their children? Sure, I had used my gifts to try and bless others, but it felt small in comparison to being someone’s mom.
But looking back I now realize I was missing a few things:
First, all the traits we love about mothers aren’t just traits that biological moms possess. They are traits that people everywhere possess—and that women are often especially gifted for.
They care for, pray for, support, nurture, protect, encourage, feed, admonish, heal and love. Indeed, mothers are a gift. But again—these are traits in women everywhere—not just in mothers.
Adoptive moms can mother.
Single women can mother.
Women whose children are wayward can mother.
Bonus and stepmoms can mother.
Grandmothers can mother.
Every woman can mother.
Even though I am not a biological mom to my bonus kids, I love to support and encourage them. And even though they may not know it, I feel fiercely protective of them. I want what is best for their lives, so I pray for them often.
I don’t need to take their mom’s place. God gave her to them as their mother. But that doesn’t mean I can’t mother them by doing the things that moms do to love and care for their kids.
Sometimes women are so focused on being a biological mom that they forget that there are people everywhere who need to be mothered. We all need to be nurtured, prayed for, protected, supported, encouraged, fed, admonished, healed and loved—and we all need to be mothered by multiple people in our lives. What someone’s biological mom may not be able to give, other women can.
So, if you feel left out or disappointed today about your state of mothering, remember that mothering isn’t just a bio mom thing. It’s something every woman can do because mothering represents God’s heart of love.
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law” (Galatians 5:22-23).
Lord, thank you that the love you have placed in the heart of moms is the love that you have given to people everywhere. Thank you that I can mother others because of this love. Help me to be grateful for all that you have given me. I love you, Jesus. Amen.
Choose someone to mother today by demonstrating one of the traits of mothers.
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